Feb. 27th, 2013 08:44 am
mythicalgirl: (pic#5358045)
 I'm doing a quickie post before my meetings start just to get my head in the right space.  

After yesterday sucked so much ass I went home at a decent time (5 pm for the Win!), had a PB&J sandwich for dinner (yeah, I know) and read more of my book (Beasts of the Walking City by Del Law).  It was a quiet evening and pretty much exactly what I needed.  Didn't stay up too late, got a decent night's sleep, and woke up actually hungry for once.  Although that probably has more to do with only PB&J for dinner thought, huh?

Right now I'm getting my head into the right place to get shit done here today.  I have a meeting at nine, out of which I'm not expecting much.  Its a stand up where we are supposed to say what we've gotten done, the next task on the list, what is in our way, that sort of thing.  Instead it usually devolves into finger pointing, accusations, and general all around crappy feelings.  Mostly because our PM doesn't know how to facilitate a decent meeting to save her life and doesn't care to learn.  I want our interim PM back - she rocked!  The current one pretty much sucks.  Sometime I step in a take control so the meeting doesn't degenerate into the grown-up equivalent of a playground argument but last time I just didn't have the energy and boy howdy!  I don't know what I'll do today.  Given my mood recently I might just sit back and smirk while everyone turns on the PM.  (OK, I won't because I'm a professional but I can dream, can't I?)

But hey, only 30 minutes, right?  Then I can put on headphones and go heads down for a couple hours to get as much of the shit that landed on me yesterday out of the way.  Then another meeting followed by I hope another couple hours of heads down desk time.  

Wish me luck.  

mythicalgirl: (bipolaroid)
 I'm still here.  Yes, it has been months since my last update.  Sorry about that.

So here's what's going on in a brief list.
  • Mom passed away January 9, 2013
  • I got back from Texas on January 13th and came back to work on the 16th.  So I was gone nearly a month. 
  • The first couple weeks back everyone pretty much treated me like I was made of glass.  
  • That didn't last long
  • I was finally, finally moved to the Architect team (I've been doing the job for over a year but haven't reported to that manager)
  • It was a move, not a promotion.  Still have the same title and the same pay, just report to someone new and get assigned as an Architect resource instead of a Developer
  • Every project I'm assigned to is currently exploding or imploding or something.  Lots of ploding.
  • Pretty much the only resource left on my old team, the one I'm supposed to be turning development stuff over to, just had surgery and is out for three weeks.
  • Almost everything that was moving to her is back on my plate.
  • Almost everything that was all hers is on my plate
  • I am losing my freaking mind
So yeah.  My stress level right now is not great.  I'm dealing with my grief over Mom.  Maybe not well but dealing.  And I was trying to do better at the work/life balance thing before today.  Now I just don't know.  

I know, I know.  One day at a time, one thing at a time.  I get done what I can, tell all my project managers, etc, what I can't get done, what needs new dates, etc.  And I'm doing that.  Just today hasn't been so good what with lots and lots of shit getting dropped on me.  I'm not quite at my best right now and my ability to bend with this stuff is at an all time low.  I'm trying but today feels more like breaking than bending, you know?

So.  Deep breath.  And back to the salt mines.  

* I'll try to update more often but damn, things are nuts right now.  
mythicalgirl: (Default)
Today my job made me cry.  
Or more specifically the stress and bullshit and self-perceived privilege of some of my co-workers made me cry.

The totally manufactured and unnecessary crisis of yesterday that I was hoping was alleviated?  Well, it is alleviated.  Now.  But not without some kicking and screaming.  
Management got involved and it escalated yet again.  
After a couple of explanations I think, I hope, everything is now cool and we are back on track.  
Documents are signed off, developers are coding, testers are completing test plans. 

And I'm worn the fuck out.  Quitting time cannot get here fast enough.  
mythicalgirl: (Default)
Come in to work, log in, get breakfast.
Halfway through breakfast OMGF!INGCRISIS!HELP!
Leave other half of breakfast to get cold. Solve crisis.
Go to meeting (still hungry)
Go to another meeting (still hungry)
Meeting turns into OMGCRISIS.  
Work with others, try to be voice of reason, solve crisis.
Go to another meeting, get asked why my shit isn't done.  See number of meetings.
Lunch and/or go outside and try not to scream
Bring lunch back to my desk.
Catch up on news, blogs and email while eating.
Halfway through lunch OMG!F!INGCRISIS!HELP!
Leave other half of lunch to get cold/warm/inedible.  solve crisis
Go to meeting (hungry, nauseous, and pissed off)
Go to another meeting, PM doesn't remember leaving decision in my lap and saying they support me, now everyone questioning decision and PM throws me under the bus.
Miss a meeting scheduled ten freaking minutes ago because hey I already have another meeting.
Results of missed meeting generate yet another F!INGCRISIS! We have to redesign the entire F!ing project right F!ing NOW!
Skip a meeting to frantically try to stem the bleeding and solve the manufactured and totally unnecessary crisis.
Crisis (hopefully) averted.  Peers say thank you.  Management = crickets
PM that threw me under the bus has OMG!F!INGCRISIS!HELP!  Tempted to flip off and walk away.
Grit my teeth and be a professional.  Solve crisis. 
Finally answer email from hours dealing with meetings and crisis after crisis.
Add several more tasks to my list.  Mark exactly zero complete.
Go home and prepare to do it again tomorrow.

* I would like this job a lot better if some of the people I worked with would use their brains for more than keeping their skulls from collapsing. 
mythicalgirl: (Default)
I have been told by more than one person that I need to update so they know I'm alive.  So here you go.  I'm alive.

The busy hasn't stopped and I don't see it even lightening up much in the near future.  I did take the day off Friday to try to regrow my brain a little.  I'm amazed at how much I got accomplished over three days (Monday was a holiday here in the US).  So much that by the end of the day Thursday I'd had enough.  

I realized after talking to my parents yesterday that that particular feeling, the one of "I've had enough", has been a pretty common one for me this year.  OK, technically I already knew that from therapy, but Dad asked how many vacation days I have left and I couldn't remember so I looked it up today.  And after taking Friday off I have three.  Three days left.  I took a week off in April.  I get 20 days a year so that means I've frittered away a day here and a day there, mostly for migraines or just not being able to face this shit, until I only have three left.  

Yeah.  It sucks.  The positive is that going to therapy is helping and I really am getting better at dealing with things without doing the avoidance thing.  The negative is I only have three fucking days left.  

So no vacations for me until after the first of the year.  Luckily I only have to wait until February when I get to take a week off to snorkel, swim, and generally let others pamper me for a week.  Not that far away when you think about it.  

So yes, I'm alive, I'm nearly out of vacation days, therapy is going fairly well, I'm OK most of the time and better overall.  
I will try for short updates more often but I won't promise anything.  
mythicalgirl: (bipolaroid)
I know I haven't been posting much here.  It seems like every time there's something I want to blog about I forget it or lack the motivation by the time I actually get a chance to sit down and write.  Some of this is the busy-busy that is work these days.  Some is the depression and anxiety.  Some is both.  

On the mental health front therapy is going well.  After a slightly rough start I'm beginning to like my therapist.  She definitely calls me on my shit, which is good, and she is also understanding, giving me kudos when I make progress.  So all good there.  I've taken to all the homework and activities that she's assigned so far except for the last one.  The Thought Record.  That one, not so much.  Mostly because the event that triggered me getting this tool happened last Thursday and by now I don't want to dig back in to it.  Although there was a minor re-occurrence today so maybe I'll do it after all.  She asked if I was comfortable doing the exercise and I said no but I was OK with trying it.  So I didn't lie and no one should be shocked if I don't have it done when I go to my session on Thursday. 

I seem to be handling things better these days although the office politics shit around here still pisses me off.  The Project From Hell is still going - and will be for another year!  I was supposed to be slowly coming off the project, turning my stuff over to developers.  Unfortunately several things hit the fan recently - everything from vendor estimates being way over the available $$ in the budget to people questioning design to other aspects of design that I was made to change coming full circle until they're back to what I originally suggested.  *sigh*  All this means that we are behind schedule (MOAR STRESS!) and being pushed to find answers NOW NOW NOW!

My other big project, which is not even officially a project as it hasn't been approved from on high yet, is already The Son Of The Project From Hell.  Why do I keep getting these things?  In this one several members of our IT management staff where part of an assessment project a year ago.  That project had no architects and no developers in it - just business people and IT management.  Now that we are actually doing this thing, digging in to the code, researching all our feeds, programs, processes, etc, the project team is reporting something somewhat different than what the assessment project team came up with.  There are a couple of members of the assessment project team that are making a BIG DEAL about this.  Basically they are being very vocal with the VP and loudly stating that I am wrong.  From what I can tell according to them I am wrong about everything.  

Which is really kind of funny seeing as I have their favorite architect helping me on the project now and I asked him about all this stuff and he was (and is) in agreement with me which would mean that he is wrong too but oh, no, he is never wrong but me, well, I'm new at this architect stuff and I'm evidently talking out of my ass because I am WRONG!.  Much of this is about ego and posturing and politics.  Some probably has to do with me going to this conference next week as the two people making the most noise have always gone up to now.  Our VP decided to shake things up and I get the impression that the two loudest voices are pissed that they ended up getting left behind.  Little do they know that I would gladly let them take my place because these things are not my cup of tea.  I'll go and do my job and learn as much as I can but this isn't a freaking vacation for me.  

The politics and ego shit bothers me the most because I don't see any reason for it.  I want to do the right thing, designing a solution that works for everyone, that is flexible enough that we don't have to redo it in a year or two.  I'm putting together a plan that    tries to touch things as few times as possible without keeping code locked for an extended time.  And I have said over and over again to anyone who will listen that I want feedback; give me concerns, suggestions, thoughts, everything.  I am all ears because I want this project to work.  *crickets*  I get nothing. Nada.  Zilch.  Then hear second hand last week that I'm wrong.  And hear it again today in a meeting that I AM WRONG!  

If I'm wrong then tell me what I need to be doing different.  *crickets*
This is why I'm in therapy.  So I can deal with this kind of shit without getting depressed, angry or going into a rage and ripping someone's fucking head off.  
mythicalgirl: (Default)
How long has it been since I've done an update?  Wow, um, I'm really sorry about that.  Seriously I had no idea it had been so long.

So what's been up around here lately?  Well, its been hot as hell for days on end with no rain.  I'm not a big fan of the heat.  Or of the sun for that matter (pale = burn).  And the lack of rain means drought - I'm not sure if its official yet or not but 16 days without rain and most of them over 90 degrees?  Yeah, not good.  

The painting is finished, or at least nearly so. I signed it so I guess that means its done.  There are a couple of touch ups to do then the gloss varnish then it will officially be complete.  Now that I've done one and I know how I can get the effect I want I have ideas for more stained glass type paintings.  We'll see if I actually do any of them.

Saw Prometheus last weekend.  Overall I liked it but damn does it have some problems.  It was entertaining but I wasn't able to get really immersed in it due to the stupid.  So much stupid!  Which is sad because there is so much there that is really cool from the look and feel of the movie to all the mythological and Christian symbolism/allegory to the Creation vs Evolution (and are they really at odds?) story beneath the surface.  Plus all the hat tips to Alien.  Pity about the stupid because if the storytelling had been better it would have gone from a fun movie to a truly meaningful one.  

Have you ever tried Chocolate Cheerios?  I got some at the store a couple of weeks ago, figuring what the heck, right?  Damn!  A bowl of these with vanilla almond milk and I'm in taste bud heaven.  I also have a box of the caramel flavored to try.  Yes, I'm having desert flavored cereal for breakfast.  Your point?

Work is work.  The Project From Hell continue to be a project and from hell.  Luckily my part is ramping down at least for the time being.  I've designed the hell out of this thing, now its time to hand my designs off to the developers.  I still have a lot of work to do, especially getting my resources to see my vision and bringing them up to speed on the project, but I don't feel like TPFH is eating my brain anymore.  In other work news now that TPFH is easing up I'm being assigned to another very large project as an architect and Subject Matter Expert.  Which means I now have another project to eat my brain.  Yay! 

In somewhat related news I have an appointment with a therapist on Monday.  As mentioned here before between the stress from the job and my regular depression I've been having periods of more intense crazy.  They could be hormonal or related to medication or just me going crazy.  Since its pretty much impossible for me to know I decided that adding talk therapy back in would be a good thing.  One of my friends started seeing this doc a little over a month ago and likes her so I decided to give her a try.  My work, thankfully, has an employee assistance program that lets me have 6 sessions for free - more than enough time to know if I like her, if I'm comfortable and if the dynamic is right.  If not I'll try someone else.  If she works for me then maybe we can find new strategies for me or break through the blocks that are keeping me from using the coping skills I already know.    

On a lighter note I have another cultural/social engagement this weekend.  My friend B- and I are going to see Idina Menzel in concert.  I am seriously looking forward to this.  And a week after that we're seeing Quidam!  Cirque du Soleil rocks!  So yay me for getting out of the house, being social, and getting some culture.  Not to mention having fun.  

That's it for now.  I have one more meeting then I can scoot.  I would promise to post more often but we know how that goes so I'll just say "Later".  
mythicalgirl: (not doing shit)
I'm bored and still having trouble concentrating today so I decided to clean out my directory on the network.  You know, get rid of old files, delete shit that has been out there for years.  I have a serious amount of old junk stored out there so it is taking a while to get through, especially since I'm opening each file to see what it is before I hit delete.

That's how I found this jem.  I must have been extremely bored on October 21, 2005 when I wrote this (at 4:30 PM if anyone cares).  I was still reading a lot of paranormal romance at that time and I think it was before I stopped reading Laurell K Hamilton completely.  It comes off as really bad fan fic complete with Mary Sue.  Thankfully it isn't long. 

Behind the cut to spare the refined sensibilites of my readers! 
Now with Typos! )

mythicalgirl: (bipolaroid)
Well, I didn't get the grass cut this weekend.  Saturday it rained (wow, did it rain) and yesterday I went to the theatre!  I went with some friends from work to see the touring company of Les Miserables - and it was great!  I really didn't know what to expect as I didn't know the story or any of the music.  It was a pleasant surprise and well worth it. 

I also watched a lot of TV, including the last two episodes of season 1 of Babylon 5, the first two episodes of season 1 of Game of Thrones, and the English-language version of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.  I've spent more time in front of the TV this weekend than I have in ages (recent vacation excluded). 

I'm obviously in a bit of avoidance mode.  Plus I'm dealing with some situational depression, which makes me cranky.  I've been unhappy at work for a while - not so much with what I'm doing, although I don't like the ambiguity of my current role (am I a systems architect or not?) but with the whole atmosphere around here lately.  Office politics have become the order of the day around here.  Doing the right things for the right reasons tend to take a backseat to one-upmanship and improving your score on the latest survey.  It makes for an upleasant environment.  Not exactly conducive to a happy workplace.  Plus there are all these projects to get done - all high profile and all needing to be done now, now, now! 

I don't talk about it here much but I deal with depression on a pretty regular basis.  I take antidepressants, which for me have been something of a miracle.  But lately I've been aware that my stress level is way up and despite the meds and other coping strategies (yoga, meditation, etc) I've been experiencing more mood swings, more irritability, and other triggers that I've learned over time mean I'm experiencing (or about to experience) a bout of moderate depression.  During my vacation week these symptoms backed off a lot.  While that could have been a placebo effect of being on vacation it is also a good indicator that the depression is situational and related to work. 

All of which means I need to make some decisions.  Best case scenario I learn new coping mechanisms and deal with work as it is.  Worst case scenario I start looking for a new job - this means change and that tends to throw my mental stability for an albeit temporary loop.  In the meantime I'm trying to get back to the gym on a regular basis, working my standard 8.5 hour day rather than 10-12 hours whether The Project From Hell requires it or not, and refusing to use my off-hours for work.  If my mental weirdness continues I'll go back to my doc to adjust my meds and find a new therapist to talk to (something I should probably do anyway). 

As for right now, well, I suppose I should actually get some work done.  *sigh*
mythicalgirl: (peas)
I meant to post over the weekend but was having far too much fun doing absolutely nothing to bother.  I took both Friday and Monday as vacation days, giving myself a four day weekend. 

It was glorious.

The only errand I absolutely had to do was take the car in for its 6 month checkup Friday morning.  Did that and the rest of the weekend was mine.  I did leave the house a couple of times to go shopping for shoes and purses - otherwise I was either sleeping, reading or surfing.  I didn't even go to the grocery store!  Other than a brief headache on Saturday (brought on by all the yahoos out while I was shopping) I even felt good for a change.  Head was fine, tummy was fine, no stress.  Mom even mentioned on the phone Sunday that I was obviously in a good mood. 

Then I came back to work today.  Made it all of 45 minutes before something pissed me off.  Today I wrestled with our new help ticket system, wrote a tech design, told my PM* on The Project From Hell that we didn't have the resources to do what we needed to (AGAIN!), and spent most of the day solving problems that shouldn't have had to wait for me to get back.  Typical day at the office.

Now I'm going to go home, fix something for dinner, have a nice glass of wine and read for a while before bedtime so I can do it all again tomorrow. 

* The PM is back after being really, really sick.  He came back Thursday but I didn't see him that day and then I was out.  The only time I saw him today was in a meeting where I and a couple of others told him everything he didn't want to hear - just as we've been doing for freaking months now I might add - and he was very unhappy. 
mythicalgirl: (shut yer hole)
I've been super busy with work and I don't see that ending any time soon.  The Project From Hell continues to be both a project and hell.  Lucky me. 

As for this weekend, yes I have to work.  At least I can work from home and avoid all the yahoos downtown.  The Super Bowl is next weekend and all the fan stuff like the NFL Experience and the Super Bowl Village opened yesterday.  Downtown Indianapolis is something of a zoo these days.  And traffic sucks the big one due to all the road closures.  My morning drive has doubled from 20 minutes to 40.  My evening drive hasn't been too bad yet although that is likely due more to not getting out of work till 6:30-7:00 PM most of this past week. 

This week?  This week is probably going to suck.  Super Bowl.  Traffic.  Meetings for TPFH day in and day out.  I'm a little bit beyond my normal stress level these days.  And I'm pissed at my project manager.  I've been telling him for months that he needs to requisition resources for me, people that have a specific skill set, in order for me to finish the technical design for one portion of the system.  Friday I reiterated to him that I needed this done and asap.  He stood there, looked me in the eye, and said "I have no recollection of that conversation".  Which is pretty much bullshit but whatever.  So I said fine, just requisition them, now, because I can't do this by myself.  I don't have the experience with the tool to write a technical design.  Requirements, yes.  Technical design, no.  He said "I have faith in you".  At which point I f!cking lost it.  It isn't about having faith in me, its about getting the right resources to do the damn job and as the PM it is his responsibility to do that.  Can I do it myself?  Yes.  But it will not be done by 3/30 as I'll have to train myself on the tool first.  His respons was about what I expected - send him an email with what I need spelled out and he'll see what he can do but he expects me to be able to do it myself and on time. 

I will not type what I called him in my head after that conversation.  It is not fit for public consumption. 

So I sent the stupid email - as well as forwarding back several I'd already sent him (don't recall that conversation my ass).  And talked to both the Enterprise Architect that is the guru with the tool we are using and one of my co-workers that is a genius with the thing.  Both are completely booked, can only help answer questions on a limited basis, and let me know that everyone with enough experience to help me is booked on the two project with higher priority than The Project From Hell and are off limits.  Which means unless there's a miracle I'm on my own. 

Yeah, not one of my better weeks.  I wonder if McDonald's is hiring? 

Wish me luck next week and in the coming months.  I think I'm going to need it. 
mythicalgirl: (leaking karma)
A few days with antibiotics plus lots of sleep equals me feeling way better.  I still have a rather full head and the drugs kill my appetite but the coughing has abated and I'm sleeping the whole night so antibiotics for the win! 

Despite not wanting to eat I did go to the store yesterday and got everything I need for Thanksgiving.  I'm doing a roasted turkey breast (since its already in the bag so I don't have to touch the raw meat!), fried potatoes with garlic and rosemary, steamed brussel sprouts, steamed asparagus, dinner rolls and Wick's sugar cream pie for dessert.  There will be leftovers.  Considering the touchy tummy I'll probably have lots of leftovers.  Which is fine, I'll just freeze half the turkey breast or use it for soup or something.  

Yesterday I started working on the vacation pictures.  I just meant to caption Greece...three hours later I realized I hadn't moved, needed to pee, and had finished all 700+ pics.  Guess I was on a roll.  Expect to start seeing pics show up here soon.  Not right now though since I'm at work and should really be, ya know, working. 

Have I mentioned that this is the project from hell?  So it was before I went on vacation and so it is now that I'm back.  It wouldn't be so bad if the TPTB were more interested in working towards a successful solution rather than winning at office politics.  Unfortunately politics is the name of the game around here these days, especially when working with an outside vendor.  Its all about winning, not about doing what is right.  Kind of sucks since it makes the rest of us feel like we're being set up to fail.

On that note I should get back to it. 

Work Stuff

Feb. 17th, 2011 10:49 am
mythicalgirl: (bipolaroid)
I haven't mentioned work here recently, other than to say that I've been busy and working on the weekends a lot.  Things there have been in flux, changing my job a little bit.  I'm still a programmer but I've also been taking on a lot of system architect work lately, designing the solutions for larger and larger projects.  The new boss of my boss is driving this as he sees me as a technical lead/architect and wants to use my experience and my business knowledge to drive us into the future.  All great stuff and very exciting.  This is the most challenged I've been in my job in years.  

I am so in over my head. 

Or at least I feel that way.  This is all new and while I'm good with theory I'm not proficient as a programmer in things like services oriented architecture or .NET or any of the things we are talking about doing right now.  Plus I'm on a couple of projects that are huge, dealing with a new business model for our products as well as government regulations.  Not easy stuff to begin with and we're early days on the projects so the scope is still fluid, throwing my design plans for a loop pretty much every other day. 

Eventually I will be able to do this without freaking out.  Right now I'm so new at this, so green, that I'm functioning at high-focus level at all times, which frankly is f***ing exhausting.  Plus I need to start fitting in eLearning and programmer play-time where I can so I can get myself up to speed on the tools we are (hopefully) going to be using.  

If you hear a huge popping sound its just my brain exploding.   
mythicalgirl: (bipolaroid)
I still felt fine when I got up this morning but as the day goes on I'm getting more and more puny.  No where near as bad as Saturday though.  My head just feels like its filling up.  Could be the weather.  Could be something in this building to which I'm allergic.  Could be because I slept like crap last night.  Who knows.  I just know that I really want to take a nap right now. 

As per usual work is kicking my butt.  I had a plan for today, damn it!  That plan unraveled about 10 minutes after I got here.  So at noon when I went to lunch I put together a new plan, one for this afternoon.  Yeah, not going so well.  So far I've gotten to exactly one (1) item on my new plan.  The rest of the time (other than this little vent session on my blog) has been spent doing someone else's work.  I have comments but will refrain from making them as I'm already feeling icky and I don't need to make myself any more cranky than I already am. 
mythicalgirl: (shut yer hole)
As previously posted, yesterday was not a good day.  After spending 3 hours with my VP as she babbled on and on and on saying pretty much nothing except that I would have no say in our future progress as a department, I went home and finished Death Of A Starship by Jay Lake.  There's a review of that book bouncing around in my head somewhere but I am too frustrated with work right now to make sense of it.  Suffice it to say that my reaction is pretty much the same as I've had to all of Jay's novels that I've read - a thoroughly enjoyable read and I have a few minor quibbles.  If I can manage to marshall my thoughts in the next couple of days I'll post a review. 

As for today, my VP hasn't so much as said "boo", my direct boss isn't getting involved, and my co-worker/partner-in-crime came in just as angry as he was when he left yesterday.  Both of us have dealt with this before; proposing ideas based on our experience and education and having them shot down is nothing new around here.  But somehow yesterday was different.  I don't know if it was the obvious brush off, being told that we (as a department) would be told our future direction by others, the almost fanatical adherence to buying vendor products rather than building (thus trapping us in a proprietary environment where our skills don't transfer), or the way all the senior IT management seems to be bending over backwards to hand over all power and autonomy to one team, because, to paraphrase, they do Java and everyone knows you have to use Java for the really geeky/heavy lifting stuff.  

Considering that I'm a Microsoft programmer being told that Java is the only tool capable of doing what we need to do just really pisses me off.  It isn't the tools, its the talent.  And I'm sick of being told that my talents aren't as good or as "important" as others because mine aren't in Java.  (I am not against Java per se - it is a great programming language.  I'm just tired of the whole Java vs .NET fight going on around here and the attitude being spewed as fact, mostly from the Java programmers, that anything Microsoft inherently sucks). 

There are always good and bad days at this company.  But this is the first time I've actually had to consider that there may not be a future for me as a developer with this division - or possibly with this company.  I'm 40, which is still a long way from retirement, so I have to decide which is more important - having a job that pays well and offers some security but provides no challenge and no autonomy?  Or finding a job where I'm challenged and doing something I enjoy, where I actually want to go to work each day? 

Seems I have some thinking to do. 


mythicalgirl: (Default)

September 2013

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