As The Crankiness Builds
Jul. 1st, 2010 01:27 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mythicalgirlAs previously posted, yesterday was not a good day. After spending 3 hours with my VP as she babbled on and on and on saying pretty much nothing except that I would have no say in our future progress as a department, I went home and finished Death Of A Starship by Jay Lake. There's a review of that book bouncing around in my head somewhere but I am too frustrated with work right now to make sense of it. Suffice it to say that my reaction is pretty much the same as I've had to all of Jay's novels that I've read - a thoroughly enjoyable read and I have a few minor quibbles. If I can manage to marshall my thoughts in the next couple of days I'll post a review.
As for today, my VP hasn't so much as said "boo", my direct boss isn't getting involved, and my co-worker/partner-in-crime came in just as angry as he was when he left yesterday. Both of us have dealt with this before; proposing ideas based on our experience and education and having them shot down is nothing new around here. But somehow yesterday was different. I don't know if it was the obvious brush off, being told that we (as a department) would be told our future direction by others, the almost fanatical adherence to buying vendor products rather than building (thus trapping us in a proprietary environment where our skills don't transfer), or the way all the senior IT management seems to be bending over backwards to hand over all power and autonomy to one team, because, to paraphrase, they do Java and everyone knows you have to use Java for the really geeky/heavy lifting stuff.
Considering that I'm a Microsoft programmer being told that Java is the only tool capable of doing what we need to do just really pisses me off. It isn't the tools, its the talent. And I'm sick of being told that my talents aren't as good or as "important" as others because mine aren't in Java. (I am not against Java per se - it is a great programming language. I'm just tired of the whole Java vs .NET fight going on around here and the attitude being spewed as fact, mostly from the Java programmers, that anything Microsoft inherently sucks).
There are always good and bad days at this company. But this is the first time I've actually had to consider that there may not be a future for me as a developer with this division - or possibly with this company. I'm 40, which is still a long way from retirement, so I have to decide which is more important - having a job that pays well and offers some security but provides no challenge and no autonomy? Or finding a job where I'm challenged and doing something I enjoy, where I actually want to go to work each day?
Seems I have some thinking to do.
As for today, my VP hasn't so much as said "boo", my direct boss isn't getting involved, and my co-worker/partner-in-crime came in just as angry as he was when he left yesterday. Both of us have dealt with this before; proposing ideas based on our experience and education and having them shot down is nothing new around here. But somehow yesterday was different. I don't know if it was the obvious brush off, being told that we (as a department) would be told our future direction by others, the almost fanatical adherence to buying vendor products rather than building (thus trapping us in a proprietary environment where our skills don't transfer), or the way all the senior IT management seems to be bending over backwards to hand over all power and autonomy to one team, because, to paraphrase, they do Java and everyone knows you have to use Java for the really geeky/heavy lifting stuff.
Considering that I'm a Microsoft programmer being told that Java is the only tool capable of doing what we need to do just really pisses me off. It isn't the tools, its the talent. And I'm sick of being told that my talents aren't as good or as "important" as others because mine aren't in Java. (I am not against Java per se - it is a great programming language. I'm just tired of the whole Java vs .NET fight going on around here and the attitude being spewed as fact, mostly from the Java programmers, that anything Microsoft inherently sucks).
There are always good and bad days at this company. But this is the first time I've actually had to consider that there may not be a future for me as a developer with this division - or possibly with this company. I'm 40, which is still a long way from retirement, so I have to decide which is more important - having a job that pays well and offers some security but provides no challenge and no autonomy? Or finding a job where I'm challenged and doing something I enjoy, where I actually want to go to work each day?
Seems I have some thinking to do.
