![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Still Here. Barely.
Dec. 10th, 2012 02:30 pm No, I haven't fallen off the face of the Earth. Although there have been days when that would have been preferable.
Things are OK but not great. My Mom has cancer and has been in the hospital and rehab since a week after her first chemo treatment the week of Thanksgiving. The cancer has her liver all whacked, which has led to massive fluid retention, then the chemo knocked her on her butt. She's out of the hospital and in the rehab facility now but its going to be a long slog to get her strength back up so she can go home. Then chemo will start again (albeit without one of the drugs).
Everyone is doing as well as they can with this. I'm dealing but my being here in Indiana and her being in Texas makes it difficult. Not that I could do anything if I were there, of course, but the feeling of helplessness gets to me some days. My appetite has pretty much come back - I lost it for a couple weeks at the start of all this - but I'm still not sleeping for shit. The best sleep I've had in months (even since before the cancer stuff) was this past Saturday from 10 to 2 on the couch. Slept like a baby and no work dreams (that I can remember).
The stress of worrying about my parents is coupled with the stress of working my ass off. The last month has been absolutely fucking insane. I just don't even know how much I've been working. Even when I'm not working, either in the office or at home, I can't get away from it. I get called after hours for production issues. I think about solutions when driving or in the shower. I fucking dream about this place and all the things I have to do. I'm working like a fiend getting shit done and my To Do list hasn't dropped below TWENTY tasks in over a month. As soon as I get one thing done more tasks show up.
The good news is that the second project I was on as an architect has been moved to one of the other architects as I just can't give it the time it deserves. The bad news is that one of the developers I had working on my apps quit. The even worse news is that now that I'm having to support the code again I'm finding that he sucked as a developer and I'm having to fix shit right and left. The worst news is that the other developer I should be able to rely on to help take up some of the slack isn't doing the job so I am currently doing the work of two people. I am an architect and a developer and somehow I'm supposed to get 80+ hours of work done each week.
Yeah, that's not happening.
In my off time (Ha!) I'm reading, mostly fluff shit that doesn't take much brain power, watching TV and surfing the web. If it takes much more than that it probably isn't getting done.
As of right now I'm still scheduled to be on vacation the first week of February. Whether Dad and I take the trip or cancel depends on how Mom is doing by then. If we cancel I'll likely use the time to go to Texas for a visit. Or sleep. Sleep would be good.
Things are OK but not great. My Mom has cancer and has been in the hospital and rehab since a week after her first chemo treatment the week of Thanksgiving. The cancer has her liver all whacked, which has led to massive fluid retention, then the chemo knocked her on her butt. She's out of the hospital and in the rehab facility now but its going to be a long slog to get her strength back up so she can go home. Then chemo will start again (albeit without one of the drugs).
Everyone is doing as well as they can with this. I'm dealing but my being here in Indiana and her being in Texas makes it difficult. Not that I could do anything if I were there, of course, but the feeling of helplessness gets to me some days. My appetite has pretty much come back - I lost it for a couple weeks at the start of all this - but I'm still not sleeping for shit. The best sleep I've had in months (even since before the cancer stuff) was this past Saturday from 10 to 2 on the couch. Slept like a baby and no work dreams (that I can remember).
The stress of worrying about my parents is coupled with the stress of working my ass off. The last month has been absolutely fucking insane. I just don't even know how much I've been working. Even when I'm not working, either in the office or at home, I can't get away from it. I get called after hours for production issues. I think about solutions when driving or in the shower. I fucking dream about this place and all the things I have to do. I'm working like a fiend getting shit done and my To Do list hasn't dropped below TWENTY tasks in over a month. As soon as I get one thing done more tasks show up.
The good news is that the second project I was on as an architect has been moved to one of the other architects as I just can't give it the time it deserves. The bad news is that one of the developers I had working on my apps quit. The even worse news is that now that I'm having to support the code again I'm finding that he sucked as a developer and I'm having to fix shit right and left. The worst news is that the other developer I should be able to rely on to help take up some of the slack isn't doing the job so I am currently doing the work of two people. I am an architect and a developer and somehow I'm supposed to get 80+ hours of work done each week.
Yeah, that's not happening.
In my off time (Ha!) I'm reading, mostly fluff shit that doesn't take much brain power, watching TV and surfing the web. If it takes much more than that it probably isn't getting done.
As of right now I'm still scheduled to be on vacation the first week of February. Whether Dad and I take the trip or cancel depends on how Mom is doing by then. If we cancel I'll likely use the time to go to Texas for a visit. Or sleep. Sleep would be good.
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
