![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
My Car is Invisible
Oct. 15th, 2008 12:24 pmNo, really, it is. I have empirical proof. Yesterday while driving to work I had no less than three people swoop into my lane right in front of me. All three did so because the car in front of them was evidently going to slow by following the speed limit and since Indiana drivers must be first they changed lanes to go around them. The fact that I was right there was irrelevant. All three missed hitting me by inches. If I'd been accelerating at the time at least one of them would have crunched my right front bumper.
Then while downtown I was turning right onto a one-way street. Four lanes for me to choose from and needed to furthest one. But the car in the straight lane next to me decided they needed to turn right as well, despite the fact that they were not in a turn late and, you know, my car was in the way. No accident but several curse words were spoken aloud.
This morning? It happened again! Granted, it was only once but I now no longer have any doubt in my mind that my car (and me when I'm in it) must in fact be invisible. Wonder Woman has her Invisible Jet. Me? I have the Invisible Vue!
I noticed something else about each of the cars that nearly hit me. All five of them (not one, not two but all five) had an "In God We Trust" license plate. Now for those of you unfamiliar with Indiana license plates the DMV in their infinite wisdom decided a couple of years ago to offer an alternative plate for the same price as the standard plate. Its a specialty place but you don't have to pay more for it like you would for a college or charity plate. This new plate has a blue background, white lettering, American flag waving majestically across the bottom and "In God We Trust" in big bold letters.
I don't have a problem with this license plate in and of itself. I've always been a wee bit irked that it's a specialty plate but people don't have to pay more for it because no money is going to charity. OK. Fine. My problem is that some people with this plate seem to think it means that God is their personal co-pilot and therefore they can drive like drunken monkeys. Not everyone with the plate, just some. And all of them seem to be gunning for me.
So either my car is invisible or there are drunken monkeys driving around. Either way I'm scared!
Then while downtown I was turning right onto a one-way street. Four lanes for me to choose from and needed to furthest one. But the car in the straight lane next to me decided they needed to turn right as well, despite the fact that they were not in a turn late and, you know, my car was in the way. No accident but several curse words were spoken aloud.
This morning? It happened again! Granted, it was only once but I now no longer have any doubt in my mind that my car (and me when I'm in it) must in fact be invisible. Wonder Woman has her Invisible Jet. Me? I have the Invisible Vue!
I noticed something else about each of the cars that nearly hit me. All five of them (not one, not two but all five) had an "In God We Trust" license plate. Now for those of you unfamiliar with Indiana license plates the DMV in their infinite wisdom decided a couple of years ago to offer an alternative plate for the same price as the standard plate. Its a specialty place but you don't have to pay more for it like you would for a college or charity plate. This new plate has a blue background, white lettering, American flag waving majestically across the bottom and "In God We Trust" in big bold letters.
I don't have a problem with this license plate in and of itself. I've always been a wee bit irked that it's a specialty plate but people don't have to pay more for it because no money is going to charity. OK. Fine. My problem is that some people with this plate seem to think it means that God is their personal co-pilot and therefore they can drive like drunken monkeys. Not everyone with the plate, just some. And all of them seem to be gunning for me.
So either my car is invisible or there are drunken monkeys driving around. Either way I'm scared!
